Monday, December 07, 2009

Silent Reverie

Tonight I sat alone at supper.  It's been a while since I've done that.  I wasn't in the back where people expect that if you're sitting alone, then you want to be left alone.  No, I was in the front.  Not that there weren't people I could have sat with, I just chose not to.

So I sat alone.  And as I sat in my silent reverie, I noticed a few things.
  1. Have I gotten old or has everyone else just gotten younger?  Spending 4 years in the dorm allows one to observe a full season's cycle of cafeteria goers.  Except for my small group of friends that still eats in the cafe, there are very few people that I know.  Most of those who were here when I began have either graduated or moved off campus.  I felt very old as I sat there, watching those youngn's come and go.
  2. The wrapped packages under the cafeteria Christmas tree are the same ones that were there when I first arrived at Southern.  I know this because every year I look at their pretty wrapping and think, "Man, wouldn't it be awesome if there really were presents in those large packages!?"
  3. I was tired.  Tired of schoolwork.  Tired of the cafe.  Tired of those chinsy Christmas trees that blink green, then white, then blue.  Green, white, blue.  Green, white, blue.  Tiring, very tiring.
  4. Next year, there won't be any chinsy Christmas tree lights turning from green to white to blue. with those same, familiar packages underneath.  And there will be days when I'll miss the cafe, miss the friends that I could have sat with, and miss those familiar old chairs that I've sat on day upon day.
Merry Christmas, Southern.

9 comments:

Johonn said...

You sure are getting old, Christy. Merry Christmas. :)

Heather said...

Reverie is healthy. Sounded familiar to some reverie I've had myself - except for a couple things...

1) I have yet another year to look forward to chinsy christmas trees and familiar packages

2)You're old, so what does that make me? :)

Christen said...

Yeah. I notice practically the same thing every time I take a break from cooking in my apartment to go to the cafe or KRs and eat with friends. I feel rather old too, or maybe it's just a sense of maturity.

Eu mesma. said...

You don't know me, I just started a blog and end up here after a random search... It was amazing... I'm Brazilian and don't really know how to communicate in English... But I am in college for 4 years now and sometimes I feel exactly like you did... I thought it would be nice to tell you, getting old is a good thing. =D

Jonas said...

I tap those Christmas presents almost every time I pass, but I'm always dissappointed by the hollow sound.

The christmas lights progression("Green, White, Blue") was a excellent way of staging that "tired of this periodicity" feeling.

Christy Joy said...

Welcome to my blog, Eu mesma.

I realized when I was sitting in the cafe yesterday (again, alone. Weird how that's been happening a lot lately) that there are actually flecks of pink and purple randomly thrown in there between the green white blue. It must be randomized because I don't think it was that way before.

Joel said...

That's a good sign, right? :) You know, if you eat at the cafe frequently, you start to recognize people, and then you're back to fitting in. Part of the cycle is fixed, and part of it is subjective.

BTW, who in the world lives in New Tazewell, TN?

EEK said...

I too have been facing the finishing of college with mixed feelings--on the one hand, I am so excited to move on, to step out of the bubble, and to be on my own... on the other hand, it is rather a nostalgic sort of thing...

Cheers to you, friend!

Christy Joy said...

Joel - Good point. And no clue, but they arrive frequently.

Emily - Cheers back!

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