Silent Reverie

Tonight I sat alone at supper.  It's been a while since I've done that.  I wasn't in the back where people expect that if you're sitting alone, then you want to be left alone.  No, I was in the front.  Not that there weren't people I could have sat with, I just chose not to.

So I sat alone.  And as I sat in my silent reverie, I noticed a few things.

1. Have I gotten old or has everyone else just gotten younger?  Spending 4 years in the dorm allows one to observe a full season's cycle of cafeteria goers.  Except for my small group of friends that still eats in the cafe, there are very few people that I know.  Most of those who were here when I began have either graduated or moved off campus.  I felt very old as I sat there, watching those youngn's come and go.
2. The wrapped packages under the cafeteria Christmas tree are the same ones that were there when I first arrived at Southern.  I know this because every year I look at their pretty wrapping and think, "Man, wouldn't it be awesome if there really were presents in those large packages!?"
3. I was tired.  Tired of schoolwork.  Tired of the cafe.  Tired of those chinsy Christmas trees that blink green, then white, then blue.  Green, white, blue.  Green, white, blue.  Tiring, very tiring.
4. Next year, there won't be any chinsy Christmas tree lights turning from green to white to blue. with those same, familiar packages underneath.  And there will be days when I'll miss the cafe, miss the friends that I could have sat with, and miss those familiar old chairs that I've sat on day upon day.

Merry Christmas, Southern.