Sunday, February 17, 2008

tips for your next hot date

Have you ever taken an eight year-old autistic child on a date as your chaperon? It's a marvelous idea, you should try it sometime. It works very efficiently. First, he insists that one of you sit in the back seat with him and share his cheese-its. Then he sits in-between the two of you when you eat. He frequently offers you bites of his food and he loves to switch all the straws around. He walks between you and holds your hands, requesting to be run and be swung in the air. He tests your parenting skills as his attention is short-lived and he, forgetting that "we're gonna do this together, ok?", tries to wrestle free and run off. He makes your heart smile when he slurs out his rendition of "Take me out to the ballgame", "If you're happy and you know it", and "Zacheus was a wee little man" in the back seat of the car. He tries your patience when he sits down in the middle of the Walmart isle declaring (in very unclear "yes" and "no's") that he'd rather have a spanking then cooperate. And if you weren't already convinced that this is something to try, he gives you both hugs, telling you that he had fun and you get the privilege of carrying him, fast asleep, to bed. Yep, definitely something to try on your next date.

22 comments:

Joel said...

Wow, sounds like a blast! I'll have to try that:)

Caitlin said...

Aw, Christy Joy - I love you!
And I've come to the realization that it is truly hopeless -
you will never be a nun :)
I knew it!

I think that George is a great chaperon :) among other things.

Little Christen said...

How fabulous, Christy! And you didn't even tell me about it!!! That's okay. At least I could read about it...

Sounds like much fun and definitely something to try. :)

chispa said...

Lol sounds like a great idea! That's a good way to go about it. :)

Anh said...

:)

...that's all I can say here...

TBird said...

fu..NUN..ny
perhaps a new column should be started in the accent after all it is Southern Matrimonial College

the article could be entitled
"Tips for your next hot date"

bekah said...

mmmmmmmmm i dislike southern matrimonial college...

Caitlin said...

I second the vote for publication in the Accent!

Kelsey said...

Spring has officially sprung, I see... I third the vote to Accent it. :)

Kristin said...

I meant to comment earlier... :) But now it will be more fun.
A. I suppose I'll have to be a nun on my own now ;)
2. I don't mind that you've left the nunnery- but it couldn't have been for anyone else.
3. I echo Bekah.
m. I love that Kelsey created a new verb.

Love ya :D

Christy said...

Joel: yes, you should. In fact, find a date (sisters are really good at helping pick good dates), and we can go on a double date, chaperoned by George :) :)

Anh: ah, yes, the "bashful" CC. You've had so much else going on that you haven't been able to fully revel in your victory. Don't worry, we'll come visit when you're more relaxed and you can sit back and smile at us :)

Tbird: look what you've started... :) Does anyone realize that I am the RELIGION page editor and not the LIFESTYLES editor? lol

Kelsey: I knew someone was going to refer to spring... lol.

Kristin: Bekah, Lorrie, and I decided a while ago that girls are too annoying to start a nunnery. So for a few minutes we decided to start a monastery but then Bekah vetoed that idea. So we decided to start "The Cool Club". Would you like to join? There is an initiation though.... lol

Anh said...

Christy, my dear sister, you can drop the "bashful" from my moniker. I have fully embraced being the CC--in fact I'm reveling in it. At this very moment I'm typing this with one hand while the other hand is patting my back.

Victory...yes, sweet victory. I have fulfilled the purpose God raised me up for.

P.S.
When are you two knuckleheads going to produce for me a S.-I.-L.?

Christy said...

only you, anh, could ever have the guts to say that. patience brother, patience. need i remind you of my DOB?? lol

Anh said...

Patience!? Patience!?
Ellen White was only 16 when...nevermind, I'm not going to go there ;)

Caitlin said...

Ahn!

cool it!

- friend/sister/mother/ext.

;)

bekah said...

oh my goodness...what is going on here...a couple hours ago when i showed jackie your post, there were only 9 comments! you have created quite a stir.

Anh said...

Sister Bekah, apparently Christy has achieved her goal in "making a statement".

Christy said...

hmmm, obviously mr. CC didn't take Caitlin's advice.

bekah said...

thanks for my warm sandwich, anh, it was very tasty :) i always thought it would be fun to work back there...it seems like a gossip fest for women ;)

Anh said...

Sister Bekah, I'm glad I was able to warm your tasty sandwich.

Working back in the deli is fun...and yes there has been a little gossip amongst the young ladies back there since Brother Jeff has been making an unusual number of visits to the Village Market lately.

Paul said...

Being married, I feel that I should share a few pearls of wisdom to the discussion.

I think a valuable viola is the best chaperon. its tough to dabble with the dangerous if your eyes and hands are always on the expensive instrument.

Christy said...

would two cellos work?

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